Emotional strain: Men 40 Women 37 easily derailed

Family and Juvenile Justice Center in Singapore to do a survey, the average age of conjugal relations with her husband 40 years old, the average age of 37 years old, when his wife most likely problems, the divorce rate is considerably high.

10 years of living together, run-in period has already passed, why not run away marriage crisis?

 

　　Trivialities of life accumulate into a blame

Shanghai Tenth People's Hospital of psychologist Professor Zhu Rongshen a recent interview with reporters, said that in men 40, women 37 years of age in this age group, the husband and wife dubious phenomenon is widespread. A survey shows that in the trifles on the spouses because of poor communication and ultimately divorce accounted for the total number of divorce into two. Have accumulated many years of marriage, lives with the problem, become the most wounding weapon.

Marriage, the first three years of run-in period, the first is a dangerous period of 7 years, 10 years later is a burnout period. 40-year-old man, 37-year-old woman of marriageable age generally 10 years or so, all in the first two to three years in a run-in period, Shang Huai inclusive heart; in 2067 when they knew very dangerous, so cherish the heart of care; to 10 years later, we all feel each other like your right-hand man, thinking that family ties have replaced love, so not a problem prior to the little things out loud will also be some small quarrel much, very hurt. Coupled with 10 years of marriage, husband and wife, or both in appearance and acted on, have become very different with the marriage, the two personality, outlook on life, money, the concept of the child's attitude towards education, stress management approach in areas such as differences will be exposed during this period without any reservation, any one of which issues are enough to paralyze the marriage.

 

Professor Zhu said: "The longer the marriage, the more of each other's habits, the more easy to overlook the importance of mutual understanding, feeling so indifferent down gradually." Which Professor Chu believes that no matter what problems, both spouses should be open communication, avoiding the problem is not a solution.

 

　　Derailment caused by external temptations

Has gone through 10 years of trials of marriage, passion gradually dissipated, if the attitude of parties to the marriage are not adjusted, you can create opportunities to give the appearance of an affair.

 

Professor Chu has pointed out that the 40-year-old men, to overcome the naive and enthusiasm of young people, with a middle-aged man of talents and experience, and size up the situation there is no lack of wisdom, such a sign of maturity on the one hand so that they can continue to emerge in their careers, attracted young heterosexual worship; the other hand, will make them increasingly unable to meet the original sit safely on the marital status, hoping to seek new changes. If this time the wife does not promptly adjust their status, middle-aged men, there will be around the young women attracted to the feelings of derailment. Many of them may even be made to the statement his wife filed for divorce.

 

After the emotions have subsided, thirty or forty year-old woman's performance of two types. A group of people would, like, like men, not satisfied with the status quo, they are mostly from coworkers and friends find solace, and some will develop to the point of divorce. Another will consider all relevant factors, or effort to save the marriage, or suffer in silence without feeling depressed life.

 

　　Discordant sex life for two separate

Differences in sexuality also contributed to the problems of marriage for men and women are now down 40 reasons. Professor Chu said that on the one hand, women in the thirty or forty years of age, sexuality, and desire most, and their middle-aged husband, is facing a decline in the status of sexuality, and even some people clearly suffering from erectile dysfunction, but also refused medical treatment. This can lead to the two men did not and, in severe cases women may take the initiative to request a divorce.

 

On the other hand, some in middle-aged women in this age group, probably because child care, health, degradation and other factors, severely degraded toward the other extreme of sexuality. If the husband's sexual desire is still strong, and this will be his derailment of a pretext.

 

Professor Chu has concluded that the marriage was so full of unknowns. Wish to marry couples for 10 years the one hand, accidents do happen emotional preparation, the other hand, careful management to ensure the stability of marriage.